Don't forget to use the study tools in your textbook and at your textbook web site, too!
Review your notes, especially for material not in the book, but on the class web site or part of class discussions.
Studying as part of a small group helps, even if it's just 2 persons.
Basics
- Key components of communication
- Encoding/decoding: who does what?
- What interferes with processing?
- Content and relationship factors (power and status)
- Transactional nature: what does that mean? quick bursts or ongoing communication?
- Example of context of communication?
- Speaking
- Denotation (objective) and connotation (subjective)
- Consider the audience; problems with the abstract
- Simplicity rules
- Verbal and non-verbal consistency
- Listening
- Hearing vs. listening: what is difference? When does learning occur?
- 5 key strategies for better listening
- Self-Disclosure
- What 4 aspects of SD does the Johari Window show?
- Gender differences
- Importance of trust
- Timing in relationship: relevance?
- 5 Strategies for Increasing Self-disclosure
- Conflict
- 4 ways we deal with conflict
- 6 Ways to Become More Assertive
- Trends in Western countries
- Gender and Verbal Communication
- Rapport vs. Report Talk: Opposites
- Gender differences
- Barriers
- Judging
- Proposing/Pushing Solutions (non-collaborative)
- Avoiding Other's Concerns
- "...speaking of"
- One-upping
- 5 Strategies for Good Verbal Communication
- Characteristics
- Ambiguous often
- Hard to hide
- "The truth will out..."
- Non-verbal leakage
- 6 ways to detect
- Clusters of non-verbal; may conflict w/ verbal
- Cultural differences
- Gender differences in non-verbal communication
- Body Communication
- Gestures: motion of limbs or body
- Facial: cultural differences
- Eye communication
- 4 Functions
- Touch
- Expresses ____________________?
- Status and power aspects
- Gender differences
- Spatial (Proxemics)
- 4 distance categories and differences
- Power and status conveyed
- Who has more space and privacy? Why?
- SSSHHHHHHH!
- Is silence comfortable to everyone? Why not?
- What does a good listener do with silence?
- Types and examples of paralanguage
- How can you convey different meaning through various elements of paralangauge for the simple sentence "My dog has fleas"? (Try with examples in Fig. 10.9)
- Intro
- More contacts, fewer close friends
- Friends now based on shared interests/pleasures/satisfactions
- Search for closeness; possibility of loneliness greater
- Expectations exceed understanding of what is involved
- Both types of friends needed
- First Impressions
- Durable
- Based on sketchy information
- Negative given more weight; mistakes viewed as "intentional"
- Also, first impressions involve social comparisons
- Components
- Attractiveness
- Attractive people viewed as "better"
- Certain physical attributes. Which ones?
- American perspectives on who is "attractive"
- Ethnocentrism a factor
- "Settle" for what type of person (as far as appearance)?
- Handicapped persons are attractive, in spite of your book's claims, even though they are "different" from the rest of us.
- Reputations
- Similarity
- Personality aspects: similarities and complementary aspects
- Propinquity-Closeness
- Get to know subtle aspects: the little things
- Interaction linked to liking (kind of obvious, yes?)
- Non-verbal
- 'You remind me of............."
- Gazers vs avoiders
- Verbal-paralanguage
- Mistaken Impressions
- False consensus
- Signs of status? Real?
- Stereotypes: a natural tendency
- "Devil' or "halo" effect
- Fundamental attribution
- Shyness
- What is it?
- What % of Americans say they have a problem with shyness (as opposed to social phobia or social anxiety disorder)?
- Similar across cultures
- 3 basic types
- What % of population has the more extreme form?
- Why does our culture "shun" persons who may be shy? Why?
- Is it genetic? Learned?
- 5 steps to manage shyness
- Keeping Friends
- Extraordinary value of friendships: name some great aspects
- "A friend in need is a friend indeed": significance of this well-known phrase
- Self-Disclosure
- Health benefits: what are they?
- Some situations of SD can backfire. When?
- High self-esteem helps
- Gender differences: describe some
- Same Sex-Opposite Sex Friends
- Intimacy among women
- Also tensions, jealousies, rejection
- Men: dominance, property money
- Sex a factor between sexes
- Who benefits more from opposite sex friendships?
- Motives (6) why people want to "keep it platonic"
- Staying friends
- Trust!
- Life transitions cause break-up of friendships: name some transitions that might cause a friendship to wither
- We're trusting less overall: why is that?
- Loneliness
- Quality and quantity is lower than desired
- Health linkage
- Duration, not intensity, key
- Declines over time
- What parental situation causes serious loneliness in some
- 4 aspects of EI (Emotional Intelligence)
- Our focus (obsession) with self-fulfillment....good or bad?
- Lonely persons exaggerate internal, diminish external as a cause of loneliness
Chapter 11 Love and Commitment
- The Ingredients of Love
- Friendship/Love overlap: where?
- Differences w/friendships
- Theories of Love
- Hatfields conclusions: passionate and companionate love
- What conditions to qualify for falling "madly" in love?
- Sternberg's "Triangle of Love": so what are the 3 components, he says?
- Cultural variations: where do people come from who place love on a "pedestal"?
- Attachment styles (3)
- "Apple doesn't fall far from the tree": what does this refer to with styles of relationships?
- Male vs. Female differences?
- Commitment
- Cohabitation: define
- General characteristics (demographics)
- What is the "cohabitation effect"?
- What are definitional features of "battering abuse"
- Are they confined to one particular group of persons in terms of social, ethnic or economic factors?
- Marriage-legal union
- What is a common law marriage?
- Is gay marriage legal?
- Do Americans support gay unions? marriages? raising children in a gay marriage?
- Are people waiting longer to marry? Why?
- Are marriages between older people likely to last longer?
- What is meant by "voluntary marriage"?
- What shift in form of love occurs later in a marriage?
- Various aspects of negative and positive aspects of interaction in a marriage, esp. Gottman, Fincham, Kalmijn studies?
- What does 5:1 refer to?
- What's "consummate" love?
- Various aspects of adustments to sharing, communication and conflict
- Are marriages more egalitarian?
- What about perceptions of inequity in household chores?
- Issues with multiple roles.
- Several approaches to solve above problems
- Dynamics of sex itself
- Frequency or quality?
- Age factors
- Double standard of heterosexual sex: what is it exactly? Is the frequency of affairs becoming equal for men and women?
- What factors are more likely to lead a person to engage in extramarital affairs?
- Divorce
- Who initiates a divorce?
- Who makes more plans to divorce
- Who is more likely to follow through with a divorce?
- Who is more likely to talk with friends re: possible divorce?
- Who thinks more about it before actually getting a divorce ? (see a pattern here?)
- Est. time to recover?
- Single Parent Families and Remarriages
- Does divorce make children more vulnerable to psychological stress and depression?
- Does remarriage cause stress
- Is there some relationship between a single Mom and potential for economic hardship? What is statistical increase in likelihood of poverty for kids for single-parent kids vs. married couple family?
- What is likelihood of success for a remarriage vs. first marriage?
- Are adolescents a source of difficulty in the success of remarriage?
- What are some of the changing views of sexuality, including some of the gender stereotypes regarding sex drive?
- What does androgynous mean?
- Where does more than half of the pleasure of the sexual response come from?
- Are most partners comfortable talking about sex? How come?
- What are some important thins to consider re: sexual communication with a partner?
- What does John Gottman say regarding four (4) destructive patterns of sexual communication?
- Why is knowing your partner's sexual history important?
- Can you name and decribe the five ( 5) stages of the sexual response cycle?
- What does "refractory" refer to?
- What are some of the differences in the male and female sexual responses?
- What does "skimmmig" refer to re: orgasms?
- What are some of the various sexual orientations? How has our government responded (or not responded)?
- Who are homophobic?
- Do you know the difference between romantic and companioate love? Consummate love: what is that?
- Sometimes there are persistent problems with engaging in sexual activities. What are some of these problems for men and women?
- Where does the burden of birth control decision-making fall? On whom?
- Do you know the basic dfferences between all the STDs?
- How prevalent is sexual victimization in the United Stes? what form does it take?
- Who is often the perpetrator of abuse against children? What is in their history that may be a factor in their becoing abusers?
- Who are often the victims of child pornography?
- What is "force" in the case of date rape as experienced by women or men
- How long due the effects of rape last in rape victims?
